What can we reason but from what we know? -Alexander Pope
Reading the room
At the risk of others knowing how often I counsel our dogs, one phrase comes to mind. Read the room. Such wisdom is mostly imparted when calamity is a probable outcome. It is frequently shared when the dogs are not paying one whit of attention to things such as their sworn enemy (the cat) blocking the doorway, or jumping up on someone they are sure they love, but instead knocking them over (the neighbor for instance). In their eager one-size-fits-all focused bearing, they rarely piece together enough pertinent information to make an informed decision before responding rashly. Just ask the delivery truck drivers.
It seems, at times, that we are quite good at failing to read the room in a lot of situations: in our work, our personal relationships and our spirituality. Our failure is mostly a lack of observational awareness on our part. We become so enamored with previously drawn conclusions that we close ourselves off from all but the reality we desire to acknowledge. Reading the room is not the entire answer, but it sure doesn’t hurt.
In Paul’s letter to the Romans, an alternate way of dealing with hard issues when they are raised is to just chill. “Welcome with open arms fellow believers who don’t see things the way you do. And don’t jump all over them every time they do or say something you don’t agree with — even when it seems that they are strong on opinions but weak in the faith department. Remember, they have their own history to deal with. Treat them gently (Rom 14:1, MSG).”
“Cultivate your own relationship with God, but don’t impose it on others. You’re fortunate if your behavior and your belief are coherent. But if you’re not sure, if you notice that you are acting in ways inconsistent with what you believe — some days trying to impose your opinions on others, other days just trying to please them — then you know that you’re out of line. If the way you live isn’t consistent with what you believe, then it’s wrong (22-23).”
Could it be that simple to mind our own business first before we mind others’? To accomplish that is no mean feat. It takes various measures of grace, patience, forgiveness and understanding to pull it off. Reading the room means leaving enough space for interpretation of events and comments, and for the very real possibility that certain situations simply will not magically resolve themselves. Reading the room might even lay unwelcome information at our feet, or result in change that needs to occur but is challenging to accomplish and yet it is a skill worth having and cultivating. It does not solve concerns directly as much as it provides a platform to work from.
Was Jesus good at reading a room? One would think if anyone could, it would be him. His observational awareness — when to speak and in what manner and to whom — confounded even the closest among him. In a perfect world, there would be definitive answers for all that ails us. Instead, we are called to be alert in faith regarding the concerns of the world around us.
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