Under the Wire

To most of the world the cowboy symbolizes unspoiled freedom. Whether a ranch cowboy trotting across the hills on his horse or a rodeo cowboy “going down the road”, he represents to most what they’d love to be themselves ... wild, free, unchained, unconnected to the world’s restraints.

Yea, right.

Even the word “cowboy” has taken on a second meaning. It can also mean a renegade, loose canon, a non-conformist. Let me tell you, nothing could be further from the truth.

Let’s take the rodeo cowboy for a moment. Camper on his pickup, horse in the trailer, nothing to worry about except the location of the next rodeo. He can load up and take off ... that is after making sure he has the proper brand papers to cross state lines. Of course, then there’s the matter of health papers. Don’t get caught in Houston without papers saying you’re suppose to be there. Speaking of health papers, how about your horse’s Coggins test paper? Keep track of which states require them yearly and others that say you’ve got to get them every six months. Going into or out of a special health restricted area? You’ll need a special permit for that.

If your dog goes along, will you be in a heart worm area? Better get him the test and medicine.

Now how about your pickup and trailer? Do you have current license plates on the rig? Proof of insurance? Cross into California and even your bales of hay and grain have to be inspected. Once in California and some other states, remember, pickups and trailers have different speed limits from “regular folks.”

By the way, are your dues paid to the various associations whose rodeos you’ll be attending? Any fines that need brought up to date? And, of course, did you remember to enter the rodeos by the prescribed deadline? While on the road, did you keep up with your bills so your cell phone won’t be shut off just when you need it the most and your gas credit card won’t max out near Harden, Mont.?

How’s our cowboy riding across the hills doing? Well, he’s OK if he’s kept his self-employment, income and social security taxes paid up. If he hires other cowboys to help him there’s workers comp insurance and liability to deal with. He may have a cell phone in his pocket to keep in touch with the vet, forest service or worst of all, the bank. If he doesn’t have one, don’t worry. There’ll be messages from them on his answering machine when he gets home.

I’m telling you folks, the life of a cowboy is an enviable one. As he rides off into the sunset, the only thing he has to worry about is ...